Let Them Be!
Sometimes when interacting with others we want to intervene with our own words and actions, telling them how we think they should feel or what we think they should do. Often times this comes from an unconscious need to feel in control and rewards us with a sense of safety and stability. We are uncomfortable with the other person's pain, so we want to take it away.
I had this conversation with David (my partner) last night:
K: "How are you feeling, David?"
D: "I miss my parents."
K: "Well, let's call them."
D: "I know I can call them. I'm just letting you know how I feel."
This is a simple example, but think about all the times you try to intervene in someone else's life to "fix" their problems. Sometimes these people just want you to listen. Let them be. Give that person the love and the space they need to feel seen and heard. Only involve yourself in whatever way they specifically ask of you.